Do You See Failure or Success?

by: Heather Dominick

I remember attending a meditation workshop with Mark Epstein, a well-known 'Buddhist psychologist.' He told a story about a meeting he had with Ram Dass, spiritual teacher and author, where Ram Dass had asked Mark Epstein about his work with his patients. As Mark talked about his work, Ram Dass interrupted him and asked, "Do you see them as already healed?"

I was so struck by this story. As a coach and healer of businesses, I saw the clarity in this question. So often as solo-service professionals it is easy to focus on our success by looking at ourselves (what we are doing, creating, visualizing, etc.), but the results are incredible when we turn the focus on those that we serve.

What do you see when you look at your clients or customers? Do you see failure or success?

When I worked as a high school teacher--in moments when my students were working on their own--I would say to myself, "The light in me sees the light in you." I really felt that. I could see my students succeeding long before they could see it or could even venture to believe it. However, I knew as their teacher it was my duty to hold that vision and energy for them and then guide them through the action steps of getting there. It always worked. I have countless high school teaching success stories.

I see that same (if not more--I've learned a lot in the past few years) success for the private and Boot Camp clients I work with now. I literally see them as a successful magazine owner, professional organizer, coach, meditation expert, Feng Shui practitioner...and the list goes on. It continues to work.

I ask you to begin to apply this to your own business. Here are 3 steps to begin SEEING success in those that you serve.

1)Change the way you look at things and the things you look at change.

In Dr. Wayne Dyer's book, The Power of Intention, he sites that, "It turns out that at the tiniest subatomic level, the actual act of observing a particle changes the particle." This is a clear example of energy affecting energy. If I look at you and see your success, then you begin to create more of and be success! How great is that?

So when speaking to a prospect, customer, or client, instead of questioning your abilities (wondering if you'll get the sale or joining them in their woes), the most powerful action you can take is to change the way you are looking at the situation. See them as happy, joyful, peaceful, well, successful...and more. You will be effecting a change that will result in more success and abundance for the both of you. (It feels so much better than worry and doubt!)

2)Be constantly giving.

The energy of success is constantly giving and the supply is limitless. When you can come from this place in your own business, you begin to attract more into your life.

I know when I first heard this, it was hard for me to grasp. Mostly, because I used to come from a place of giving, but have one eye immediately on making sure that I was compensated and at the same time convinced that I wouldn't be. Guess what? I wasn't and I felt a whole lot of resentment at the same time.

When I shifted my attention to giving for the sake of the success of those that I was serving and simultaneously confidently took care of what I needed for myself and my business (instead of waiting for someone else to do just do it), there was more success ALL around.

3)Detach from the outcome.

When you are able to SEE success, you don't need to be attached to the outcome because you KNOW that it's going to be successful. Whenever you are caught up in accumulating (I have to get this client; I have to sell to this customer), then you lose sight of what your main goal is--to see the success of those that you serve.

Find out exactly what's going on for the person that you're speaking to. Ask them and ask yourself, what do they need? The answer to this question is usually multi-layered. (For example, prospects that come to me may need more income from their businesses, but they also need to move through the blocks they've unconsciously set up for themselves that's keeping them from getting more money). So, you then SEE them as getting their needs fully met and begin the process of working with that person, so you can help make it happen.

Call To Action:

1) Ask yourself, how do I see my prospects, clients, or customers? Be honest. Just let the answer come. No judgment. It will give you a lot of information.

2) With whatever answer you get now, ask yourself, "How can I improve?" How can I see this situation differently?

3) For one day focus only on those you serve and their success. Write down the difference in how you feel, the results that your clients get, and anything else that pops up.